So I got an email today from the vice-principal. She gave the information I sent to the EAs (classroom/lunchroom assistants) and *gasp* - none of them had ever seen any of what I mentioned. NO WAY! My children are faking someone out...I cannot believe it. Did I not mention that they would act like angels for the first month or so? Now, I am wondering if they all just think I'm crazy and then I realize that I don't CARE! Nope. Crazy woman is my Native American name now. Like 'call me Ishmail' - but crazier!
I'm back to wanting the sign. I want to laminate something and carry it and have it say "You can think I'm crazy and guess what? It won't change my home life...THAT will still be crazy!"
This morning was very quiet at my house. If I couldn't say something nice - I decided to say nothing and there it is. Seriously, not a word spoken from me - except "time to leave for the bus". They got breakfast, they got supervision and they got safely sent out the front door. That was the best I had today.
I met some ladies for coffee at Starbucks and I'm yet again impressed with the glory of friends and strangers. So many people have told me that they are scared to talk about attachment disorder, scared of being judged harshly or honestly, being embarassed (heck, I'm embarassed everyday...) - and I get that. I was scared too. But, since I've named it and claimed it - I have been truly blessed. I've yet to meet anyone IRL that hasn't been totally supportive. Not that they get it - how can you without living it? But, they listen, they care about someone going through something hard (me at this time). I was afraid I would end of blubbering over a frap at the table and instead I could talk and laugh and feel ok. Yes, I had to go back to real life and I'll have to a mom again in a few hours...but wow...how fabulous my life is to get the joy of being listened to.
I read an article today about how to bring yourself out of a funk. Most of it was the typical stuff - be thankful for what you have (two children trying to kill me), name 5 things that have gone right lately (Starbucks...and.....ummmmm.....), so on. One of the ideas said to give back. Volunteer or even buy a gallon of milk for a neighbor...that one I like. People give to me a lot...I'm going to find a way to do that each day. Just give back...