function junction - and the nuts!

I sent a sick kid to baseball last night because I didn't believe he was sick. Once home he asked for a backrub and I could tell the fever was there. That may officially move me into the 'mean mom' category - although, admittedly, he wouldn't have wanted to miss practice. So, I have one home sick today - one taking CSAP tests (and nervous about it) and one just cruising along. This morning the tragedy was snack time. I told DD that I was giving her a tupperware with nuts in it - brain food, right? She watched me pour the nuts from the mixed nut container. I showed her the nuts to know the right amount should she decide to take nuts as snack on a day that I can't help her. We discussed how nuts help you and you should eat a few from time to time. Then I walked out of the kitchen and heard her say "yuck, mom is making me take raisins for snack". Those are moments when I wonder how we get her from point A to point B. I walked in and took the snack and told her that fake drama doesn't get her a desired result. So, she won't have a snack and some mom at school this afternoon will try to sneak her something because "poor cute little girl with the mean momma who didn't send snack". Oh well!
Last night as I was driving home from practice I said "there are two milks open and one expires today and says 2/17 on it. Please use that one for dinner." When we got home DD stood at the pantry looking at all the cereal boxes trying to find the one that said 2/17 and DS2 poured himself a big glass of milk from the new gallon of milk. Therefore I decided that they probably never hear what I say - DD did kinda, even remotely, hear that I said 2/17...but did not apply it correctly. DS2 - nothing. While at practice for a whooping 20 minutes, DD asked me 20 times "what should I do?" - she had homework, a book and a toddler that wanted to play with her. I ignored her question over and over and so, she just kept asking. There is a major lack of connecting behavior with outcome!
DH and I get to have a parents only time coming up very soon. It's for DH's business meetings - but they are fun. We are heading out to Florida for 5 days - with no kids. A good friend of mine (who is a teacher) is staying with the kids and she gets the concept of what we are dealing with. I know that she'll continue to enforce rules we have in place + they could probably use a break from me as well. I have no doubt they'll be angels - seriously. They generally are for everyone but me! So, I'm leaving and not worrying about it - sitting on a beach or by a pool and having drinks with umbrellas. I can't wait! Preparing for the trip is a whole other topic - my OCD kicks in and suddenly everything in the house is labeled with instructions for use. The remotes, the medicine basket, stacks of clothes with socks, underwear and shoes contained. Anal - totally. But, when I leave I feel as though everything is in place.