Sunday, March 29, 2009

Two days in the life

Just for kicks I'm going to list the things that DD has come up with to drive us crazy in just two days. Someday this will be like a time capsule for me and in those moments of looking back and laughing (PLEASE, let that happen) - I'd like written proof of her prowess for crazy parent making!
1. She walked through the middle of a parking lane - the dead center - while trailing us as far behind as she could and then was shocked when we were chasing her down to drag her to the side.
2. She was sitting in quiet time while we unloaded groceries and picked up the dog ultrasonic noise machine (yes, I'm trying to train my dogs too) and was pushing it so much that the dogs were going crazy...then she accidently hit the button that makes a sound humans can hear and tried to say that it went off by itself.
3. She saw me rubbing my eye and asked over and over "mom, what's wrong?" - while I tried to calmly ignore the stupid question (if I answer everyone, I'll never be quiet)
4. She asked me if I'd like to eat fried slugs "yes, everyone wants to eat them" - No, I mean if you were forced to in the jungle - "well, if I was being forced it wouldn't matter if I wanted to" - madly crosses her arms and says 'you aren't listening to me' (why do I attempt to have these circular conversations)
5. After being sent to her room (as in grounded until I could deal again) she came out approximately every 3 seconds to ask 'how long am I grounded?'
6. She asked if she could write in her diary before bed, I said yes. Then she asked if she could draw - I said 'you can write' - but can I draw? - "you can write" - but can I draw? - "you can write" (still being unemotional, but steam coming out of my ears)...she goes upstairs and 10 minutes later comes down with the pictures that she DREW for me!!!!! Self-tattling, self-sabotage and blantant disrespect - all in one!
7. We stopped in front of the library and gave her the books to run up to the return slot. As she's moving to the door we say, hustle out there are cars behind us. So, she gets out and leaves the door OPEN. When we are hollering - come shut the door - she turns, looks at us and walks down the stairs. DS2 shuts the door from inside (climbing across seats, etc.)...when we turn around to pick her up, she runs in front of a car, opens the wrong door and tells her brother to move to the other seat! We've now stopped traffic in two directions!
8. After being told a million times that if she asks for a privilege, it won't be given...she comes down today and says "can I have a piece of gum? I was good for 5 minutes."...she was confused when I said no.
9. After stealing from the last house she was invited to and being told there wouldn't be anymore playdates for a while - she has asked 10 times to either go to someone's house or have someone over - in 2 days.
10. While in time in with me - right now - she is popping spit bubbles, rolling around on the bed sighing, tapping her pencil on her head - and getting no response...very annoying to her (and to me...but I'm holding it together)
11. Without being asked she offered up to me that the voice in her head told her that walking in the middle of the street would be safe and while she was walking there she thought that I'd be happy with her for keeping herself safe!!!!!

I'm forgetting's been a long two days....


  1. I think there should DEFINITELY be 13 of these!!!!

  2. I have a question. How did she show you the picture she drew (when she was supposed to be writing) ? Was it as if you DID tell her to draw and she had no idea she should have been writing? I tell my daughter one thing and she does the opposite right in front of me, but acts as if it is not wrong. She is so good at that I question my sanity. I start to think I'm not being clear enough with her. I then would say at the end of every sentence, " Do you understand?" But that didn't help either. She would say yes, but then still disobey me. I even tried having her repeat everything I told her. She will just blatantly do the things she is not supposed to do but act SOOOOO innocent about it. I think she could beat a lie detector test. It's a whole new realm of lying that I did not know existed. It really makes me question myself.