We get to see the doctor tomorrow, we get to see the doctor tomorrow (sang to some corny Broadway tune). I hope we really do see him and he really does listen and get us on the right track. Another screw up by DS2 yesterday - just as we were letting his leash out a tiny bit. UUUGGGGGGHHHHHHH! I will say that while running errands today he was an angel - not touching siblings (can't say that for the other two) and stayed right with me. He APOLOGIZED for lying and not following directions yesterday - that is huge for him. He seemed to actually be sorry, like I could see emotion in his eyes. I gave a big hug for that and actually felt ok hugging him. That sounds so sad, huh?
DD has been a bright spot lately. I can see changes in her that I wasn't expecting to happen so quickly. Oh my, she's still my little drama queen and lies like it's normal...but in other ways, I am seeing connections. She reaches out for me more (like multiple times a day), she uses her words in actual conversations instead of blurting out some silly stuff to simply attract attention. She had a sleep over at her friend's house last night. I hate, hate, hate the talk I have to have with the parent(s) before she can really be at someone's house. Although I'm feeling much better about being open now...it's still hard to say "my DD has some struggles and may tell you things that aren't true about me". Yuck...and add to that the fact that I never know if they really understand the importance of what I'm saying. I refuse to be happy with the fact that DCS could show up on my doorstep because my DD thinks a story about Mom using pliers on her skin is funny. I called this morning to check on pick up time and DD answered the phone. Huh??? Why would my DD be answering their phone? She was confused (her word) because the dad said "will one of the girls get the phone?" - I explained that he meant one of HIS girls and she is NOT his girl. She honestly looked confused by that. My DD still thinks that she just might be living somewhere/anywhere else at any moment. So, like I said - steps forward, jump on the slide backwards!
College football is saving me right now. I love it and will watch any game and so many are on and when I'm stressed I just sit down and watch. Maybe I'm not getting as much done as I should, but I feel happy when I'm watching...worth something!!!